The Wisdom of Her Parents

"I cannot assign evil to a holy God. Lauren was stolen from us, but because of her contract with God, she is now in His care."

-- Sheila, Lauren's mom, said this to me the night of the funeral and again this evening while I was on the phone with her. Lauren was stolen...but is now with God. I don't yet know if I find this explanation helpful or upsetting. I realize she is with God, and yes, that is comforting. But to think of her as having been stolen--? Right now, that makes me angry. For me, I have to believe, and do believe, that God had a divine plan for Lauren's life. And although I may not understand why she has passed, I know she allowed God to work in her life and use her as a witness for His glory. And that is settling ...

It is late now. So much more to say, and I will get to it all...eventually. Sheila did say she is interested in the autopsy results now. Immediately after the funeral, she did not care either way, since nothing would make any difference or bring Lauren back. But now she, like so many of us, wants to know, "What happened?!"

Today has been fair. I can't get Lauren out of my head. She's in my dreams, but nothing tangible. And she's in my wake time...still, nothing tangible. I've come close to calling Lydia Lauren four different times now. I'm ready for my brain to take a vacation. Perhaps instead of all the girls getting tatoos, we can go in for lobotomies?! Do they give temporary lobotomies like they do temporary tatoos? Should look on ebay for that tomorrow...will keep you updated.

Until tomorrow,

Pleasant, peaceful dreams...